Yesterday morning I’m standing at the bus stop bright and early, still waking
up, sipping at a chocolate milk that I’d picked up at Shoppers Drug Mart on
my way over, and more or less minding my own business.

“MRAAAAAHH!” This crazy little old lady screams, lunging out from
behind me at my chocolate milk. So of course, my body does the only logical
thing it knows how to do when little old ladies sneak up on me and scare the
bejesus out of me, I fling my chocolate milk up into the air, and it comes
showering down on me, the sidewalk, the newspaper stand, the bus shelter…
of course none on her. I close my eyes for a moment and clench my hand and
will my heart to stop racing, and when I re-open them, she’s scowling and
growling at me, about 3 inches away. I stand there, as calmly as I can, until
she gets tired of making agressive animal noises at me, and wanders off down
the street.

I thought at that point that it was only fair for me to pop out from behind
her and scare her back, but I figured that since she didn’t seem all that
stable to begin with… maybe it wasn’t the best idea.