Natasha and I payed a visit to our favourite sushi spot on the weekend and after the meal was over the chef came out and chit-chatted for a bit, sharing some stories about working in the Teppanyaki industry – you know, where you go for dinner and the chef puts on a big show and does all the fancy knifework and lights your table on fire?

“Drew Barrymore!”

I’m not able to name names, but he had a couple of hilariously gory stories to share.

Apparently it’s quite common to slash your hand and quickly hide it behind your back – chefs practice one-handed so they can continue the show until a substitute can fill-in for them.

One time, during a show, his hands had gotten greasy and while he was doing some knife flicks, throwing bits of food onto the customer’s plates, one of his knives slid free and caught a customer right behind the ear – and it stuck. He freaked out apologizing, but the dude he stabbed in the head started applauding and going on about how it was the most exciting meal he’d ever had.

Another time, a rival teppan artist put a shrimp in a customer’s mouth and flicked the tail off with his knife – only he caught the customer’s nose and took the end right off. At this point the chef starts making “blood squirting from the nose” hand gestures, and I’m happy that I’d finished eating.